The understanding and removal of all egotistical,
negative, vicious,, ignorant, and traumatic experiences and attitudes in each
center and all areas of our life.
To heal the damage from the past, and move forward into a holistically healthy and spiritually aware life.
To heal and remove ignorance and delusion that may give rise to thoughts and feelings that we are "bad and unloveable", whereas in truth we are only suffering from ignorance concerning human behavour.
HEALING WITH THE HEART CENTER
USING HEART LOVE TO HEAL AND IMPROVE RELATIONSHIPS
When we experience negativity in any relationship we have the responsibility to deal with our emotions.
We can use relaxation breathing to force the body's relaxation response. We may have our own methods. One thing we must not do is put any toxins like tobacco or alcohol into our body in the belief that this will help "calm us down and relax". Alcohol and tobacco DO NOT relax us, they simply dull our intellect and encourage an incorrect and damaging response - they make things worse!
Sometimes, we cannot catch our emotional reaction quick enough and we can say and do things that make matters worse and that we later regret. This is normal but it is something that we should be aiming to improve, developing our ability to RESPOND to a situation and not REACT out of heightened emotions and fiery intellect.
Whenever we experience negative situations in our relationship with any other person then when we have calmed down and the emotional hormones have left our body we must send healing love from our heart to that person. This removes toxicity from the relationship and replaces those harmful and negative emotions with calm and balance. This allows you disengage from any emotionally charged reaction that you might have expressed and that may make the relationship worse.
The word "heal" is from the Old English word "hal" and the Greek word "holos," which both mean "to make whole or complete." The word "religion" is made of the latin roots "re" and "ligare" (join) which means to re-join, bring together, or unite. These major concepts indicate a natural movement to connect things which have been split apart.
Every person receives some form of psychologically damaging experiences in their life.
If we become persistently unhappy and/or depressed, we might need to investigate the possibility that:
We have been damaged by some of our life experiences.
We may have some sabotaged stages of development.
We may need to spend some time investigating the source of the damage and healing it.
What needs to be healed?
- Inner child.
- Family relationships: Parents and siblings.
- Inner adolescent: family, peers, mentors, guides.
- Romantic relationships.
- Stages of development.
- Relationships with Teachers, Guardians, and Mentors.
- Work colleagues.
- Business relationships.
- Loss, grief, heart break.
- Blocked/damaged heart center.
- Blocked/damaged/imbalanced chakras.
- Egotism: selfishness, greed, vice, and spiritual ignorance.
- Purification of the seven centers
THE IMPORTANCE OF HEALING THE PAST
The childhood learned behaviours in our seven chakras are a primary source of our today's experiences of pain, frustrations, confusion, depression, discomfort, subconscious life-reactions, useless and annoying personality traits, and holistic disease. By taking the time to heal ourselves, we take the first huge step towards becoming a happier, more compassionate and understanding person. By healing we remove the unwanted attitudes and behaviours from our own system.
We get happier, others get happier. That's the way it works. By healing our relationship with our parents and our past, we remove huge obstacles to health and happiness in the seven chakras, especially the heart chakra. We need a functioning heart chakra to become a true human being.
WHAT USUALLY HAPPENS IF WE NEGLECT TO HEAL OUR PAST
If we don't heal ourselves then life tends to get worse for ourselves and others as our unhealed pains dominate us and dictate the types of experiences that we can have. As within, so without. If we have inner pain, then we will have painful and negative outer experiences. I believe that healing offers the sensible way through this psychological minefield.
Some of the Experiences that we might expect if we don't heal our childhood pains.
We may spend a huge amount of time and energy trying to find "parent substitutes" in our daily relationships with other people. This only leads to embarrassment, pain and confusion. The hurt and confused inner child trying to sort things out. When we do find suitable "parent substitutes", whether these are romantic partners or work associates, then we begin to play out all the unresolved childhood issues. People run away from us and we are left lonely, confused, and in pain.
We live on "autopilot", caught in the conditionings of our childhood personality, we cannot adapt to new life situations and thus substantial reduce our life experiences.
We pass on all our baggage and unresolved issues to our children, thus making them unhappy and confused.
We have a high probability of becoming addicted to the pleasure principle in an attempt to "blot out" our inner pain. Alcoholism, drug addiction, sex addiction, compulsion, obsession, and pain.
We fail in all our attempts to become a happy, satisfied, integrated, useful, and wholesome person. We get bitterly disappointed and confused, and then we project all this pain onto the world and it's contents - eg; Hitler, Stalin, Pol Pot.
Is the emotional age of the speaker more child like or parent like, than adult. This suggests that the selves are protecting the inner child's "unparented vulnerability". If a strong inner Mother or Father is present the emotional age and intensity will be more adult. Notice here the major difference between the TA 'parent' and the 'inner parent'. It is normal for people to try to reduce their pain and emotional pain is no exception. A person experiencing deep emotional wounding or anxiety is extremely vulnerable and will do whatever they can to block it.
When children can't be themselves for fear of punishment or neglect, they attempt to change and "act" in the ways that will please their parents. In this society, this is generally accepted as necessary "training" in order to whip "unruly," "unmannered," and "uncivilized" children into shape.
Whether we like it or not, training makes children "act" differently than what they are. And an act is an act - it is a false set of behaviours that sits like a mask over the "face" of the person acting. In ancient Greek theatre, the actors wore masks with protruding, horn-shaped mouths to project their voices to the crowd. The mask was called a "persona," which means "through sound." Since that time, the word persona has been used to indicate the various acts or masks that we project over our true selves.
In "civilized" society, acting is so rampant that we take it to be a normal part of human nature, and consider our "personality" (which is a false self) to be a good thing. We don't begin to question this false personality until we start having trouble knowing who we really are and what we really want out of life.
Unfortunately, the training of children doesn't stop at the creation of one false personality. Children are often under so many different expectations that they create more than one mask. In fact, they usually create a main personality and a few other "subpersonalities." In the extreme, this personality splitting manifests itself as Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) or what was popularly known as Multiple Personality Disorder. When things get this fragmented, the different personalities act without knowledge of the others. Needless to say, it is a debilitating condition. Fortunately, most of us don't experience this extreme.
I have never met anyone who doesn't have at least two subpersonalities. If you've ever had an argument with yourself, you have experienced this phenomenon. Although this may seem normal, normal doesn't necessarily mean "healthy," it just means "common." Some illnesses are common, and this is one of them.
Subpersonalities manifest themselves as patterns of behaviour that appear during different circumstances or times of stress, and are often characterized by differing behaviour patterns, trains of thought, or "thought voices."
It is in moods and inner conflicts that subpersonalities are most easily witnessed. The different "mood" is often a subpersonality. When parts of us argue, these parts often have distinct tones, physical postures, and behaviours. These parts are also subpersonalities. It's usually easier to witness this phenomenon in others. That may be a good place to start!
Subpersonalities were alluded to by: Freud in his theory of personality structures that included the id, ego, and superego; Eric Berne in his Transactional Analysis theory of the inner child, adult, and inner parent; Fritz Perls in his Gestalt theory of the topdog and underdog; Arthur Janov in his Primal theory of the real self and various false selves; Robert Louis Stevenson in his book The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. It may be frightening to imagine that we are this split, or that we share similar traits with others who seem very ill. Unfortunately, this concept is unfamiliar because it has been kept hidden as a general cultural denial. In my experience, the discovery of my own subpersonalities was a tremendous relief. I finally understood certain aspects of my behaviour and was able to treat myself with compassion instead of the usual confusion and self-loathing.
The word "heal" is from the Old English word "hal" and the Greek word "holos," which both mean "to make whole or complete." The word "religion" is made of the latin roots "re" and "ligare" (join) which means to re-join, bring together, or unite. These major concepts indicate a natural movement to connect things which have been split apart. When we are split into subpersonalities, it is our nature to move toward unity. We don't have to live this way forever.
Since it is a lack of fundamental acceptance that forced us to split, it is acceptance of who we are, even in our illness, that will reverse the process. By accepting our subpersonalities, and expressing them in a safe setting, the conflicts between them can begin to dissolve.
We have to take the broken pieces gently in our hands before we can begin to glue them together.
UNDERSTANDING AND HEALING SELF-DISLIKE
Q: Why do we sometimes dislike or hate ourselves?
A: Because we are ignorant concerning self-knowledge and self-mastery. This leads us to behave in ways that we do not understand, that we cannot control, and bring unhappiness to all. We need to understand and learn to master the human experience so that we become better people and can share our knowledge with others.
Generally when we don't understand or like ourselves then we behave in ways that:
- We don't understand because we lack self knowing
- Hurt others
- Hurt ourself
- Lead to failure
- Disrespect and denigrate ourselves
- Are below our own or other's expectations
- Make mistakes and uncover our weaknesses (this is actually a good thing so that we can find out what they are)
- Embarrass ourself
- Do things that we know are wrong
- Do things that we know we should not have
- Do things that we know will have a negative outcome
- Don't do the things that we know we should
- Behave in slothful, wrathful, and negative ways that will only lead to pain for ourself in the future
The most powerful step forward is to use a holistic life management system like HELM to gain self-knowledge and self-mastery; to understand our body, mind, emotions, responses, and how we relate to the people and world around us. This is a big help because as we gain self-knowledge and self-mastery then can steadily transform our life on the inside and on the outside. By using such a system as HELM we will:
- Understand our body, mind, emotions and responses
- Overcome most, if not all, of our negative and weak beliefs, attitudes, and habitual thinking
- Have the power to overcome harmful and damaging attitudes and beliefs
- Stop hurting others
- Stop hurting ourself
- Learn from our mistakes and failings and turn them into life-experience and success
- Respect and like ourself
- Know our limits in all areas and know how to gradually push back those limits in a sensible manner
- Transform our weaknesses into strengths
- Using our increased will-power and determination we will:
- Stop doing things we know are wrong
- Stop doing things we know we should not do
- Stop doing things that lead to negative outcomes
- Overcome all the slothful, wrathful, and other negative attitudes and habits